Of mice and...mice!

Yep, I have a snake, not exactly the first pet I thought we'd have as a family but that's life, and as it happens, this particular reptile is even more picky than my five year old when it comes to the gastronomical side of things: he doesn't eat vegetables either, or dead rodents for that matter, which necessitates live rodentia, and as I live 100 miles from the nearest purveyor of fine rodent specimens, the easiest thing to do is breed my own.  So now I have a snake and mice, but my rodent breeding attempt got off to a bad start, namely my original foursome of mice all turned into gentlemen mice, and as progressive as our modern world has become, it has not yet made any impact on the rodent world.  It took several weeks to figure that out and a grand trip to town to procure female vermin, it also meant that my population dynamics were very much behind schedule, as the snake had to eat in the interim, but not to fear, we had a plan.

But as with all brilliant and diabolical plans, something went wrong, namely my dear hubby decided not to make the journey into town the other day to procure more rodentia to tide over said snake until our mouse population is self sustaining, it was only a blizzard after all and now the poor snake will have to go hungry for a bit.  But that's the weird thing about snakes: they don't have to eat like us mammals.  The books says this particular species has been known to go months and up to a year without eating and still does fine, so I suppose he can survive a few days until we again can make the grand trek to town.  If only you could buy live mice on amazon!

From utter terror to laissez faire

I remember bringing our son home from the hospital and wondering what I was supposed to do now, I'm in charge of a life!  I called a friend who had also recently brought her first child home for moral support and we survived the first few hours and then an entire night and then an entire day...  Then you bring your second one home and casually hop on a plane two weeks later, child in tow!  With the first you observe all the 'rules' be they pediatrician guidelines or governmental regulations, with the second you can't remember what the rules are, except they aren't supposed to have tomatoes until they are twenty three or was the thirty, and I think egg whites?  I've found myself adding a little salt to those mashed up carrots and even resorted to letting her cry instead of getting up three times a night (she's now sleeping through the night after only 2 weeks of gradually cutting back on night time excursions on my part).  A friend (with 2 kids at the time, now up to 4 and expecting 2 more!) told me once that she 'hadn't slept through the night in 4 years,' and I really didn't want that to be me.  So at six months of age and twenty plus pounds, I decided she could at least cut back to once or twice a night and as it was going so well we pulled an all nighter and she does just fine.  Sleep, my old friend, how I have missed you!  Parenting does get easier with experience, but I'll never be an expert, as there's always a new phase or personality quirk!

New Year's Resolution Breaker

If your new year's resolution is to lose weight/eat better, run away, run away fast, because this recipe for cheese sticks (in your waffle maker) is amazing and even better than the restaurant appetizer.  So if you are still here, enjoy!

Design your own fudge recipe (easy!)

Over the years I have refined my fudge recipe to match my cooking style: messy, impatient, and haphazard.  I've done the 'stir for 10 minutes over high heat' only to get extremely hot, with a tired arm, and a scorched mess too many times to count.  Then I discovered the microwave version.  And not only is it real fudge (you boil the milk, sugar, and butter, nothing else is actually fudge, no matter what the title of the recipe) but you can make pretty much any sort of fudge you want; you can make so much fudge you'll hate the very thought of it (yes, that is possible) and swear it off for the next two years, but you always come back, always...so here's the basic idea:

For a 9x9 pan (double for a 9x13 pan):

In a large (6-8 quarts, especially if doubling the recipe) microwave safe bowl combine:

1/2 cup (1 stick) real butter
5 oz (2/3 cup or 1/2 of a 10 oz can) evaporated milk
1 1/2 cups sugar (white for most flavors, but use brown for caramel fudge)

Microwave on high for 7-10 minutes, stirring every 2-3 minutes.  You should maintain a vigorous boil of the ingredients for at least 5 minutes, so if you have a wimpy microwave, have doubled the recipe, or are starting with frozen butter you'll want to cook for a longer time.  If it turns dark brown instead of a nice cream color (and you aren't using brown sugar), then reduce the cooking time on the next batch but it will still be very edible.  If you undercook it, it won't set so increase the time on the next batch but enjoy the 'failed' batch with a spoon or as ice cream topping!  This is the base of your fudge, now you get to customize it.

Mix in two cups of tiny marshmallows and anything else that needs to melt (peanut butter, baking chips, caramels...) and stir like crazy until everything is melted and smooth.  Then add flavoring (mint or vanilla extract) and anything you don't want to melt (m&ms, crushed candy canes or Oreo cookies...).  Then pour into a greased pan of the appropriate size and let it set before cutting and enjoying (though feel free to lick the spoon/bowl!).  Store in the fridge or freezer.

So what are some flavor variations, ideas to get you started?:

Chocolate: add 1 cup chocolate chips and a tsp of vanilla at the 'melty' stage, or use mint extract for chocolate mint!

Candy Cane: use 1 cup white baking chips at the melty stage, then stir in 1 tsp mint extract and 1/2 cup crushed peppermint candies.

Peanut Butter: add a cup of peanut butter at the melty stage and a half bag of m&ms at the 'stir in' stage.

Cookies and Cream: 1 cup white baking chips (melty) and 1 cup crushed Oreos (stir in).

Caramel: 1 cup white chips and 1 cup caramels (melty) plus use brown sugar instead of white.

So what kind will you make?  Coffee, pumpkin, cake batter, cookie dough, peaches and cream...?

Anglophiles unite!

It is so nice to know I'm not the only one!  Apparently there are many closet anglophiles among us, hence the need for this nifty little article outlining a proper English Christmas, even if you aren't marrying a Prince anytime soon, this is a fun peek into life on the other side of the pond.  Best of all, I was quite correct in assuming American taste in holiday music is atrocious, bring on the carols!  Though I will be passing on the Brussel sprouts...

In the closet

You can say just about anything in public nowadays pertaining to your personal habits and it is pretty much accepted, if not applauded as you being authentically you, as long as it isn't murder or otherwise criminal.  But I have recently discovered a loophole in those public accolades.  It isn't criminal.  It's even a good deed, a favor for some friends.  But I think I may have to relocate to the proverbial closet because of it.  A young lady we know is getting at adorable puppy for Christmas.  She can freely tell people and they're excited and congratulatory.  We on the other hand, are rather mum on the new addition to our household.  Yes, we agreed to watch a snake and its food: mice.  Yep, we're those people!  It's specieism pure and simple.  Other people get warm fuzzies, but our only warm fuzzies are snake chow!  But maybe it will keep the in-laws from visiting...I hadn't thought of that, perhaps there are advantages after all?  He's really a very nice snake...really!  But yeah, he's a snake...please excuse me while I go scouting for the best closet in which to lose myself...

Crescent Rolls!!!

I'm in love again, yep, my cast iron crush has given way to my infatuation with seasonal baking and what says 'Happy Holidays' like crescent rolls?  Thanksgiving, Christmas, midnight snack after feeding the baby...they're good anytime, but finding a descent recipe seems nigh unto impossible, until now!  I've tried, I really have, I'm so desperate to emulate the scary concoction that comes in the little tubes at the grocery store made out of things only pronounceable to an organic chemist that for some reason taste so good (in all their fake buttery glory) and come out so light and layered and fluffy, I just can't make a decent copy without resorting to the time consuming croissant/puff pastry type recipes which are tasty but ridiculously inefficient when you are making dinner for 17 and have 9 kids under the age of 5 all needing something NOW!

I've tried all the 'crescent roll' recipes in every church cookbook owned by myself or relatives back to great grandmas on either side.  I've exhausted Betty Crocker and her ilk all to no avail.  Yes, the rolls are buttery and have a nice flavor but they don't have the fluffy, layers from the 100% laboratory produced specimens.  Then I found this recipe.  They are easy, quick, and amazing!  Okay, when I say quick, I mean they are quick to come together but they need to sit overnight or for a couple days in the fridge so you need to plan ahead but otherwise they are amazing; you can also bake them and freeze them for future use.  You really do get light and fluffy and delicious!

I also used margarine instead of butter (cheapskate!) and as I didn't have evaporated milk I thought I'd boil some regular milk down and make my own, only to realize you also add water to the recipe, which made me wonder why on earth I was boiling down milk to make evaporated milk and then adding water back into the recipe, why not just use regular milk and be done with it?  So I skipped both the water and the evaporated milk and substituted straight milk for both (1 3/4 cups total I think).  Also, you want to keep your dough cold like you're making croissants or puff pastry otherwise it is a sticky mess.  When you divide it in quarters to roll it out, keep the unused quarters in the fridge until you are actually rolling them out.  Enjoy!