I was riding with a friend the other day and my son was along, she has a little girl a year younger and asked if she needed to spell the word 'cookie,' in my son's presence, as she must in her daughter's lest he throw a fit. A day later I was shopping for a few small items to fill a shoebox to be sent to a child somewhere in need this Christmas, my son was along and insisted that he should have his share of the gifts in the cart, though he has a house full of toys, he still wanted more. I firmly told him 'no,' and that was the end of the matter, explaining that he had no reason to doubt or worry that his parents and extended family would not take excellent care of him this Christmas, not that he even needs anything.
Both of these incidents were rather curious, not that they are out of the ordinary in either modern society or human nature, but the different approaches to parenting in the matter say much about our culture and us as individuals. A child should be able to hear of some delightful or negative (in their mind, think nap) word and not fall to pieces when they do not immediately receive the former or are anticipating the latter. They should also be able to peaceably complete a shopping excursion without being bribed into compliance with a new toy or a treat. I fear we are buying momentary peace at the expense of our children's self-control and future happiness. No wonder kids get to college and need to be 'protected' from everything from Shakespeare to world history to bad grades and poor athletic performance. We never taught them to endure the word cookie without falling to pieces, how much less can they be expected to handle the disappointments of the real world? Do the world and your kids a favor: teach them the word 'no.'
No comments:
Post a Comment