Full on Nerd Mode

 I guess it is official, I've suspected it for years: we are a family of nerds, of geeks, of irredeemable weirdos, isn't it great!  Yesterday we bought a praying mantis egg case for our son for Christmas (and he is delighted).  I'm expecting an email on how to get certified to test poultry for salmonella (and excited about it).  I've decided to read the Silmarillion and am officially waitlisted at the library.  And this is just one day.  I hope you don't deny your inner nerd, let it shine!

Be Interesting, Read Good Books!

 During a rather long winter season of even longer colds and influenza and whatever other respiratory ills were lurking about like villains in a bad gothic novel, I thought I'd peruse our state library's online offerings and read me some modern literature.  Ugh.  Of 800 offerings categorized 'Christian' 600 were Amish/Western type romance fluff, very few of the others were even that enticing.  I sampled a few of these Hallmark movie turned novels and after a few cavities I gave up in despair, apparently all that it takes to be a Christian nowadays is to refrain from any sort of PG13 content, throw in a few sentences about a Good and Faithful God, and look we're 'Christian.'  This is why I stick with stuff written prior to 1973 (that and most 1930 and prior writings are public domain!).  I've been reading things like The Worm Ouroboros and The Once and Future King, along with Chesterton, Austen, and Tolkien lately (and boy is my daily lingo waxing archaic!).  Good solid books that make you think and grow and ask questions and ponder.  Habits society doesn't think we need any longer, what with AI and google, but which I argue we need even more desperately if we can ever hope to compete with such.  So put down that flimsy modern novel, or better yet, get off YouTube (or at least watch a good documentary!) and get ye to a library or even project Gutenberg and find a book actually worth reading, yes it might be hard, or a little slow, but it will make the world a broader, more interesting place and you an actual person, instead of a soulless bot who knows nothing but the latest feed on social media!  

Banff, Quail, and Licorice

 Yes, it has been a hectic and interesting period since my last post.  I thought my first post would be about our trip to Banff (splendid!) or our new obsession with raising domestic quail (adorable and tasty) but I guess it is going to be about licorice.  Yes, that wheat containing sugar product you can't make at home and have it gluten free (sorry, it is just taffy kids!).  That thing I can now sit here and eat.  Yes, my mysterious malady has gone the way of all flesh, happily without me.  Toddle on over to 'a companion to owls' for the full story.  It was a miracle plain and simple.  15 years of pain, lethargy, dietary Russian roulette, and social stigma and isolation gone just like that.  And while I did get a nice cookbook out of it, I must say, real wheat bread is still way better than anything I could make or buy, though that pizza crust on the Walmart pizza we bought to celebrate wasn't all that great!  I'll get around to the other topics eventually, thanks for the chat!

Fiber, graham crackers, and other notes of middling to no interest!

 I've republished my psyllium gluten free baking book as the 'Happy Fiber Book,' with a little synopsis on fiber (exciting, I know!) to make it more palatable to the fiber community (if there is such a thing) or for those who like whole grains but haven't a clue about gluten free baking.  There are a couple new recipes in both along with a new cover, as well as updating the haphazard guide.  Also the graham cracker recipe is missing 1/2 cup brown sugar and becomes a nice pliable dough instead of a semi-liquid with the psyllium.

Boldy going where apparently nobody has ever gone before? Making bread specifically to make croutons!

 There are very few things you can't find on the internet, one of them is obscure acoustic guitars last made in the late '70s, another is apparently the egregious sin of making bread specifically to make croutons.  To most people, croutons are best procured pre-made by the modern industrial food complex.  And there is nothing wrong with that.  Most people don't make their own bread, let alone their own croutons.  Or they have some leftover bread they want to use up before it turns into a rock or grows penicillium mold and is therefore no longer organic (sorry, science joke!).  But why on earth would you go to the trouble of making bread and then turn around and 'ruin' the wondrous creation by turning it into croutons?  The simple answer is dietary necessity!

I love commercial croutons, they are cheap and tasty, but alas, due to dietary restrictions I can no longer eat them.  There are probably some really good gluten free ones out there too, but I can't afford them and they likely contain stuff I can't eat anyway.  The other issue is that gluten free bread has to be eaten warm or toasted, which is great if I'm at home and need a meal, but what happens when I'm road tripping or working a twelve hour shift somewhere that makes our semi-wild road trips look urban and civilized?  I need something I can eat on the trail, in the car, or in the barn that doesn't taste worse than the plastic bento box I pack it in.  Chips and crackers and I don't really get along and packing gluten free bread is a drag, especially on my appetite, ugh!  Then I remembered croutons.  So yes, to me they are a vital necessity when away from home (and a great snack when I'm there too!).  I often had bits and pieces of gluten free bread products I wanted to use up anyway but lately that hasn't been the case, so can I make bread just to make croutons?  Is there something I can do to streamline the process?  Google wasn't helpful in the least, but I remember life before the internet, so I thought maybe it was possible, even if the interweb failed to agree with me.

I took a rimmed baking sheet, sprayed it with cooking spray, spread out my usual bread dough in it, so it was about 1 cm thick and then covered it and let it rise.  I then baked it until golden brown and solid.  I let it cool on a wire rack then cut it into 3/4 inch squares, tossed them with butter, bouillon, and garlic pepper, and then toasted them until crunchy in my ninja foodi.  Yes, you can make bread just to make croutons!  Take that google!