No!!!

Yes, (evil laughter), another Mommy Blog (more evil laughter)!!! Life is a story, mine at the moment just happens to occur mostly at home, which means no sword fights or dragons, but plenty of peril, misadventure, and food. Like all good stories we will skip the boring parts (like laundry). So gird up your loins and let us commence with some real domestic adventures; don't forget your sense of humor.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Cannibalism and artificial coloring, oh my!

I believe I have discovered the last nutritional bastion of evil on the planet!  We have already had uproars about every type of human edible item, dilemmas about cattle feed, and near panic over dog treats made in china, but woefully our society has neglected our aquatic friends, yes, the goldfish's day has come at last.  I have two finned children, two common platys each a year old, sadly their algae consuming brother vanished a month or two ago; the local constabulary is still investigating the disappearance; you have probably seen it on the nightly news.  But with all this hullabaloo revolving around every sort of eatable on the planet, I am disgusted that more attention has not been paid to the baleful plight of our dear submerged companions!    If goats deserve dietary justice, why not the guppy?  This wanton discrimination must stop and for it to stop the ignorance must be dispersed.  Link this highly educational article to all your virtual friends and shine light in the darkness, let the revolution begin!  Yes, these poor aquatic prisoners are forced to consume a diet whose main ingredient is fish meal which makes our unhappy ichthean brothers involuntary cannibals, a situation NEVER encountered in nature.  Not to mention that this vile formula, undoubtedly common to all commercial fish diets, contains artificial colors, chemicals no one but a chemistry major could pronounce, and even possibly GMOs but thankfully no high fructose corn syrup.  Phone your senator immediately and demand action!  This is an emergency, let our finned friends suffer no longer!  We want organic, non-fish, non-gmo, non-corn syrup, no artificial colors, all natural, etc. etc. fish diets and we want it now!  This heinous act must stop!

Yes, this post is completely ridiculous and was meant to be!  I have a couple fish but no finned children, alas the algae eater did vanish but we decided to treat it as a private matter and have not called the police about it.  And yes, in the wild or captivity, fish are quite fond of eating one another.  Those dangerous and unpronounceable chemicals are vitamins.  I was just feeding the poor creatures this morning and glanced at the label, and wondered what it might sound like if I put this silly issue into dramatic language to create a 'crisis.'  We have been upset about worse!  It seems anything can be an 'issue' if someone phrases it the right way.  Let us hope this does not go viral and actually become an issue, as I will no longer be able to afford fish food in the future if the alarmists have their way and the poor dears must go hungry.

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